I Wish…..!!!

January 25, 2008

I wish that we could be allowed a greater degree of autonomy when it comes to dealing with patients. Rather than having to prescribe to a rigid protocol or algorhythm we should be allowed to administer a certain amount of “Corrective Re-Education” to our cerebrally challenged clients!

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For instance….if you should by any chance happen to be prescribed sleeping pills (diazepam 2mg – take one at bedtime) and then feel drowsy, then please when you dial 999 at 3 in the morning do not be surprised to be soundly beaten about the head and body!

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 Also Available in Ambulance Green…

Why do I seem to get these patients when I,m on nights?


Home Remedies…!!!

January 25, 2008

Found this on Theos site and thought I would share it with you…it made me chuckle!

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Simple Home Remedies

1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the shower.

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4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

7. You only need two tools in life – WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn’t move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn’t move and does, use the duct tape.

8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

Daily Thought:

SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR
ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN
PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS

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“Ouch…!!!”


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